Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Me Before WE

Posted by Daring Delightful Digital Diva at 2:25 PM 0 comments
Overheard at work: "You need to become a ME before you're ready to become part of a WE". WOW! Brilliant phrase! And the concept is amazing!

As a mother of five, several being teenagers, they are learning about dating and relationships. I married young, far too young, and it ended in divorce. Nothing bad about either of us, but very well may have been simply starting out too young. Before we each were ME's before we entered into a WE.

My only hope for my children is that they become ME's. That they experience things, places, and people in the world. Before they commit to a WE.
  • College, education, and at least the first "real" job
  • Travel and experiencing different areas and lifestyles, regions, and people therein
  • Financial security - learn to live within their means, even if those means are meager at first. And handling your own credit cards, debt, spending, and saving.
  • Relationships - date other people, see what works or what doesn't, and hone in on who might be a good long-term fit. What do you like to do together, simply hanging out?
  • "#Adulting" as my kids say - even our oldest is learning to adult - deal with financial aid, make apartment decisions, job decisions, and financial. And he's only beginning!
  • Finding out more about yourself as a human - what makes you tick, how do you handle stress, happy times, bad times, and what you enjoy doing for hobbies and for fun. Who do you gravitate towards and what type of friends do you choose? Find out many of these things before you find a partner, and life is good!
By doing all of these things, I believe that my kids and many other young folks just like them have a chance to make a marriage or partnership last - through the good times and bad, and through the growth that inevitably will happen for each person.

Ahhh, Me Before We. I love it!
Daring, Delightful, Determined Diva

Friday, January 6, 2017

Courageous Authenticity

Posted by Daring Delightful Digital Diva at 1:28 PM 0 comments
Today marks six years at my job. The one that I uprooted my life and moved myself and two kiddos to this new town just the three of us. Life has turned out lovely for me over the years, having met dear "family of choice", and built a new life filled with friends, adventure and activities, and met my husband and three bonus kids. Life is good.

Today, my new supervisor sent me a congratulations for the past six years and thanked me for my "COURAGEOUS AUTHENTICITY." Wow. That sparked some inner soul searching for me: that a boss fairly new to me, and remote to me since I am onsite with my client, could see and say that I exhibited this trait. Again, wow.

Authenticity is my life, and quite frankly I don't know how else TO BE. I have had friends joke that I cannot lie about the brand of deodorant that I use, and wear my heart on my sleeves, and the list goes on and on. I had not thought of being authentic as the courage to be yourself, or that many people are not. I suppose that's true, whether you are stuck in a dead end job, a terrible marriage, or in a sole role as a parent and have lost yourself as an individual. I tried online dating some years back and had several dates and gentlemen that said I was EXACTLY as they'd expected based off of my profile.  I remember thinking, how could you NOT be like what you write about yourself? Ahhh, see, I was being authentic and learned the hard way that some people are not, perhaps opting for embellishments, tall tales, and wishful thinking. I am authentic to the core: what you see is what you get.

Authenticity can also be expressed as a series of choices we make: being real, showing up, and being honest. To let my true self be seen. That is a life worth living. Why would we want to be fake, keep up a show, be someone or something we aren't?  What purpose does that serve? Does that honor ourselves as valuable and worthy individuals born to be here on this planet in this time and space, in this life, and with much to offer the world around us? 
Since this Courageous Authenticity was job-related, I have thought about my role, my job, and my leadership abilities. I have been pursuing my master's degree in Business and Marketing and have taken leadership courses within that. I have learned a lot about leaders and types of leadership, but I've learned about myself and my leadership qualities in the process. I suppose that's the point! I do try to be very authentic as a whole, and use that in my leadership style, whether that is speaking at a conference, setting an example to my children, or leading this wellness program for this client. This is the only way I know how to be.

I am glad that someone noticed, and Happy Anniversary to me! Here's to more courageous authenticity in 2017 and beyond!
Daring, Delightful, Dependable, Decent, Direct Diva :) 


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